George Duncan

Marketing copywriter/consultant, author

Leaving the Google Glass behind

From Watch Your Ads — A media memo by George Duncan

Got your Google Glass yet? Keep an eye out for the next killer app in bio-wearables. It’s a suppository that connects the user to everything all the way up the food chain. Bottom to top.

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Possible side effect, death. Huh?…

Should the FDA allow meds to be marketed if one of the possible side effects is death? Among the medications advertising that depressing outcome is the antidepressant Cymbalta, “Severe liver problems, some fatal, have been reported…” says the Cymbalta ad – but they say it quickly. Really?  I’d rather stay depressed. Also a blood thinner named Xarelto which, the ad says, “may rarely lead to death.” That thin, I don’t need, rare or not.

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What would Martha Graham do?

One of the classiest ads I’ve seen recently is a  :30 spot for NISSAN Altima. It has an attractive couple interpreting the Altima’s various features in the movements of modern dance. Here are classic takes on moving object detection, blind spot warning, lane departure warning (my favorite) and more. Very cool.

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Man up, you guys!

First, the guys in the Cialis ads are getting younger. Damn. Still getting more than me. And for four hours, no less. Talk about macho! Get those big, strong horses out of the van and let their big, strong muscles pull that truck out of the mud. That’s a real guy, you couch wimp.  Got testosterone? Not without Axiron, you don’t! Rub a little of this stuff in the armpits and stand back! You’re a man among men! …and women. Just don’t get too close to those armpits, that stuff will kill you. Just ask Tony Siragusa. He’s connected, see, and he’ll show you how to guard your manhood, see, with Depends Shields and Guards. Don’t give me any of that leakage crap! Strap on those shields and guards and go live your stupid little life, ok?

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Do the math

I’m lousy at math, but a question that bounces around my brain whenever I see the Colonial Penn Insurance ad is: what’s a unit? They say the insurance is only $9.95 per unit a month. What? It runs by fast so you have to pay attention. Per what? Per unit. OK, so what’s a unit? They don’t say. My guess is a unit is $1000 of coverage. If that’s the case, a $10K policy (probably the minimum worth having) would run $100 per month or $1200 a year. So in a little over 8 years, payments will have exceeded the face value of the policy, but you’ll have to keep on paying or cancel. Yikes!

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That’s a great question.

What question? Never mind, it’s a great question. A great question!

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United Nations yogurt

Have you caught the ad featuring Mϋller (mit an umlaut), selling Greek yogurt, backed by an Afro-Cuban beat? Very big at Cannes.

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Thought for the day:

Progress isn’t about where you’ve been –

It’s about where you’re going.

~ Ram Trucks

Keep clickin’…

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